When you’re the only one making an effort in a friendship, these 8 signs confirm what you feel

Have you been in a one-sided friendship?

A one-sided friendship can be painful and hard to handle. There is nothing more disappointing than caring so much for someone who is just passive or shows little to no effort.

When you have this kind of relationship, you tend to ask yourself why this person cannot put in the same time, effort, and love as you do.

For those who are clueless about this type of friendship, it is important to recognize the signs before you invest time and effort in a one-sided relationship.

Here are some signs that you and your friend are not on the same wavelength:

They never contact you first

There are times when our friends are too busy to reach out to us. However, if you are the one always contacting them first, chances are they don’t remember you at all.

If a friend cares about you, they will always remember you even when they are busy, and when they are not anymore, they will text or call you to ask how you are doing.

They only reach out when they need something

This friend might reach out to you first on a rare occasion. As the caring and loving friend that you are, you will be so excited about it only to be disappointed when you find out what it is about: they only need something from you.

You might think they see you as a dependable person but don’t take it as a compliment. Accept the obvious fact that they only remember you when they need you.

They always cancel plans

In a one-sided friendship, you always initiate communication and make plans. There are times they will agree to meet up with you but they also find it easy to cancel these plans.

If you are unlucky, they might even cancel at the last minute, which is not only disappointing but also disrespectful. It only shows that they don’t value your time and they’d rather be somewhere else than be with you.

They are not interested in your life

When you talk to this friend, it seems like their mind is always somewhere else. They seem disinterested when you are talking about your work or your personal life.

They also do not show interest in any of your hobbies or ask you to do something fun with them. When they finally talk, it is always about them and you are never in the picture.

They don’t show any support

Real friends support you in everything you do but a person who is not always contradicts you. When you tell them you want to try something, they will discourage you right away.

You may feel like this friend doesn’t want you to be happy because they can’t support you in any aspect of your life.

You can’t count on them

People always say “A friend in need is a friend indeed.” Sadly, this does not apply in a one-sided friendship. The other person will only remember you when they need you but when you ask for their help, they are always missing in action. You can always count on your real friends and they will find a way to help you even if they are miles away.

They always get to decide about everything

When you make plans with this friend, they always get to decide where to go or what to do and they don’t even ask for your suggestion or opinion.

It means they do not respect your interests and they want to be the boss in your relationship. They show little interest in you but they want to control you whenever they can.

They ignore or disrespect your boundaries

Because they are selfish and bossy, they pay little care to what you want or do not want to do. When you say “no,” they will still take it as a “yes” and force you to do something you don’t like.

When a friend does not respect your boundaries and always crosses the line, it shows that they don’t acknowledge you or respect you as a friend or as a person.

Is it Time to End your One-Sided Friendship?

If your friend does some or all of these signs to you, it is obvious that they don’t see you as a friend but only a person they can get benefits from.

It must be tiring to be treated like this while you pour your heart out on that person. However, before you let this friend go, talk to them first and share what you feel about your one-sided friendship. It may lead to a deeper understanding of each other and what you should work on to improve your relationship.

If their response is not good, it won’t hurt to cut ties with this person and free yourself from all the pain and disrespect you got from being the “only friend who cares.”