9 ways to deal with toxic coworkers at work while protecting your energy and staying calm

Learning how to deal with toxic coworkers is a challenge most professionals face at some point.

When ignored, one negative person can drain your energy, hurt your job satisfaction, and affect your career growth.

Understanding the signs of toxic coworkers and learning practical strategies can help you stay focused, maintain team morale, and safeguard your well-being.

Whether it’s a colleague who constantly takes credit for your work or a teammate whose complaints bring down the whole office, toxic coworkers can make the workplace exhausting.

Mason Farmani, a Los Angeles-based personal and corporate coach with over 30 years of experience, emphasizes that a toxic environment only has power over you if you allow it.

By setting office boundaries and prioritizing self-care at work, employees can maintain focus while reducing workplace conflict.

Recognizing toxic coworkers before they affect team morale

Farmani told PureWow that it’s essential to distinguish between someone having a bad day and someone stuck in a toxic cycle. He identifies four key traits:

• Chronic Negativity: Persistent pessimism can damage team morale.
• Gossiping: Sharing confidential information or rumors can escalate workplace conflict.
• Inflexibility: Refusing to adapt to new methods or ideas stalls progress and frustrates colleagues.
• Overly Competitive Behavior: Seeing colleagues as rivals instead of collaborators can erode teamwork.

Recognizing these behaviors early allows you to take proactive steps before your energy and morale are depleted.

How to deal with toxic coworkers at work

Farmani offers practical advice to protect yourself without escalating conflict.

1. Set Office Boundaries Clearly

Farmani explains that politely but firmly communicating your limits is critical. This protects your energy while maintaining professionalism. Employees who establish boundaries help reduce the impact of toxic behaviors and maintain team morale.

2. Practice Emotional Detachment

He advises that some personality traits are beyond your control. Staying neutral and avoiding emotional reactions prevents toxic coworkers from influencing your mood or work performance.

3. Listen Without Absorbing Negativity

Active listening is key. Farmani stresses the importance of acknowledging a coworker’s feelings without getting caught up in the negativity. Doing so can help de-escalate workplace conflict while maintaining your emotional energy.

4. Limit Personal Interactions

It’s not necessary to be friends with toxic coworkers. Farmani recommends keeping conversations professional and work-related, helping protect self-care at work and minimize unnecessary tension.

5. Keep Perspective and Don’t Take It Personally

Toxic behavior reflects the individual’s issues, not your worth. Maintaining this perspective allows you to protect your mental energy and reduce workplace conflict.

6. Focus on Self-Care at Work and Outside

Dr. Monica Vermani highlights the importance of self-care outside of work. Engaging in hobbies, exercise, or time with loved ones is essential. She emphasizes that “engaging in activities and pursuits we love is a pillar of self-care,” and maintaining this balance reinforces resilience against toxic coworkers.

7. Remain Solution-Oriented

Farmani notes that redirecting toxic conversations toward practical solutions prevents complaints and gossip from spreading. Staying focused on actionable steps reduces conflict while promoting team morale.

8. Don’t Avoid Direct Confrontation

He points out that many employees silently endure toxic behavior instead of addressing it. “Often, someone will choose to silently endure the behavior, hoping it will resolve on its own, rather than kindly confronting the person and setting boundaries,” Farmani explains. Taking polite, respectful action prevents escalation and sets healthy office boundaries.

9. Avoid Mirroring Toxic Behavior

Trying to retaliate or gossip back can worsen workplace conflict and damage professional reputation. Instead, maintaining professionalism ensures you’re part of the solution, not the problem.

Strategies from experts: Gray Rock and Socratic questioning

When standard strategies aren’t enough, techniques like the Gray Rock Method or Socratic questioning can help.

PsychCentral explains that the Gray Rock Method involves acting unresponsive so that an abusive person loses interest.

Verywell Mind describes Socratic questioning as asking open-ended questions to guide reflection rather than confrontation.

Farmani notes that “The Gray Rock Method is a particularly useful strategy when dealing with narcissistic individuals.”

Minimizing emotional engagement deprives toxic coworkers of the reaction they seek. At the same time, Socratic questioning encourages them to reflect without creating conflict.

Both strategies support office boundaries and maintain team morale.

Handling toxic managers or senior staff

Dealing with toxic behavior from supervisors requires careful planning and management.

Farmani recommends keeping detailed notes on incidents, including dates and behavior, to create a factual record.

Employees should attempt to set boundaries by calmly explaining expectations, focusing on facts rather than feelings.

This approach can resolve issues without escalating workplace conflict.

When to deal with toxic coworkers through third-party mediation

In some cases, internal efforts fail, and outside mediation is needed.

Farmani explains that bringing in a third party is appropriate when workplace conflict affects productivity, team morale, or dynamics.

Mediation can address recurring issues and provide long-term solutions. Still, it should only be considered after direct attempts to resolve the problem have been made.

Learning how to deal with toxic coworkers is about protecting yourself while maintaining professionalism and fostering a healthy work environment.

By establishing clear office boundaries, practicing self-care at work, and applying expert strategies like the Gray Rock Method, employees can effectively navigate workplace conflict, maintain team morale, and stay focused on their goals.

Watch Jennifer Brick, speaker and author, as she shares the smart way to deal with toxic coworkers at work and protect your energy and focus.