Study reveals that husbands stress women twice as much as children do

Given that children have needs that require constant tending and attention, people often think that the greatest source of stress in a family is the children. However, a study conducted by Today shows that husbands stress women more than their children.

With more than 7,000 mothers from the United States participating in a recent survey and an interview conducted by Today, the result shows that most mothers rated their stress levels at an unsurprising 8.5 out of 10.

What makes the study surprising though is that about half of the mothers who participated in the survey and interview said that, more than the children, the husbands were noted to be a greater source of stress.

Many people, especially husbands, may react with disbelief to the study’s findings. However, separate research from the University of Padova also supports the conclusion that husbands stress women more than their children.

According to the researchers, it can be observed that upon the death of the wives, the health of the husbands often deteriorates. In contrast in the case of the wives, after the death of their husbands, they turn out to be healthier.

Apparently, women can cope with depression and stress a lot more easily than when their husbands are still with them. One in every five mothers said that a major source of daily stress was a lack of help from their significant other.

The study conducted by Today shows that splitting household tasks between the husband and wife is one of the factors contributing to the stress of the wives. 75% of mothers feel that they shoulder most, if not all, of the household chores.

This includes taking care of the children, keeping the house at its finest, doing the laundry, and preparing meals on top of attending to their husbands as well.

With all of these responsibilities shouldered by one person, be it a stay-at-home wife or working mother, it can really be exhausting, tiring, and stressful.

In addition, a study shows that 1 in 5 husbands does not help with managing the family or the household. This can be especially difficult for mothers raising multiple children, further supporting the idea that husbands cause women more stress than their children.

However, in the defense of the husbands, a study finds that 2/3 of husbands would like to help out their wives. All the wives need to do is verbally acknowledge that they need their husbands’ help.

In simple words, the husbands would help if the wives would ask for it. This is because men are oblivious to the stress faced by women in managing their children and home. Since the wives are not asking for help, they often assume that the wives have everything under control.

“Even though I have a committed spouse, I still feel like all the pressure is on ME to get everything done. I work just as many hours as my husband does, but yet I do all the scheduling.”

It is no secret that when it comes to organizing things, women top men. The same goes for handling matters concerning the household. However, this is not because men cannot be depended on.

Some women do not rely on their husbands simply because they cannot fully trust their partner to take on household responsibilities. Instead of sharing the household chores, women tend to do everything all by themselves.

“I feel like I am figuring out a lot about parenting on my own without the input of my husband.

This stresses me out because when something goes wrong, it is all my fault.”

With the habit of taking all of the household and parenting concerns on their shoulders- women tend to blame themselves when things go beyond their control. Given these circumstances, the stress is not contained physically anymore but emotionally as well.

When you and him are fighting always remember, it’s you and him vs the problem, not you vs him. Do not be disheartened by the findings mentioned above.

After all, if there is a problem, there is a solution. In all problems faced by couples, all you need to keep in mind is that your and your partner’s bond is stronger than the challenge you are facing.

A solution suggested by marital experts is to keep your communication open at all times. If only all of the couples around the world would communicate and talk to each other, a lot more could be accomplished without too much stress at all. Assuming that your wife has everything under control all by herself is wrong.

Assuming that your husband does not care and does not want to help you at all is wrong. Talk and share your concerns to each other.

What should a wife do if she feels like she is doing everything in the marriage while her husband never helps?

If your husband assumes you have everything under control or doesn’t realize you need help, it’s important to speak up. Asking for help doesn’t mean he’s not contributing—it’s about being specific, says A Prioritized Marraige.

For example, you could say, “I have to pick up the kids, buy groceries, and do the laundry. Could you help with one of those?” A positive tone helps, as criticism may discourage future help.

It’s not just about asking but also accepting help when offered. If you often say, “I’ve got it,” your husband might think you don’t need support.

Accepting help gives you a chance to share responsibilities and teaches you to delegate. Many husbands are happy to pitch in—they just need to know what’s expected.

While it’s easy to feel frustrated when things aren’t done your way, try to be patient. Like kids learning new skills, your husband may need time to figure out unfamiliar tasks.

Instead of redoing his efforts or getting annoyed, remind yourself that different methods can still get the job done. A quote captures this well: “The next best way to do something isn’t the wrong way.”

Sometimes, reluctance to help isn’t about unwillingness but about uncertainty. Offering quick guidance, like showing how to use a snowblower, can foster teamwork. Small tutorials can turn individual tasks into shared responsibilities.

Expressing gratitude can make a big difference, even when you feel like you’re carrying most of the mental load.

Thanking your husband for taking out the trash or giving input reinforces his efforts. Over time, this can shift your mindset to notice what he is doing rather than what he isn’t.

Gratitude also encourages more help. When people feel appreciated, they’re more likely to step up. With time, your husband might even start asking how he can make things easier for you.

A little appreciation goes a long way—and it just might change how you both manage responsibilities.

Raising a family sure is not an easy feat to accomplish. But at the end of the day, when two people are equally trying their best, and giving their time and effort, the amount of stress fails in comparison to the joy brought by a family.