8 habits to build self-confidence: expert tips to become a more interesting person

Being an interesting person isn’t about status or wealth—it’s about how you see the world, the stories you tell, and your passion for life.

A fresh perspective and staying true to yourself can leave a lasting impression without the need to stand out in extraordinary ways.

Dale Carnegie once said in his 1936 book, “How to Win Friends & Influence People,” “To be interesting, be interested.”

This classic advice reminds us to stay engaged with the world by having meaningful conversations or following our passions.

Yet, when daily routines start to feel repetitive, staying inspired and keeping that sense of curiosity alive can be challenging.

Dating coach Damona Hoffman, host of the “Dates & Mates” podcast, shared with HuffPost that being an interesting person isn’t a fixed trait. It’s a skill that’s cultivated through deliberate actions and consistent practice.

Just like any other interpersonal skill, the more you engage in it, the more effortless it becomes.

Below are some tips to help you become an interesting person.

1. Read

Traveling can expand your perspective, but you don’t need to leave home to explore new cultures or time periods.

Whether it’s classic novels or modern blogs, reading offers a powerful way to experience different stories and ideas. This habit can boost empathy and understanding.

“People who read more fiction were better at empathy and understanding others,” Psychologist and novelist Keith Oatley highlighted in The Washington Post.

2. Be curious

Marriage and family therapist, Annisa Pirasteh of Act2Change Therapy & Wellness Center in Atlanta, encourages building curiosity by interacting thoughtfully with everyday surroundings.

Speaking to HuffPost, she recommended starting small, like exploring social media with a curious mindset.

For instance, noticing an exciting recipe could lead to trying it out, hosting a dinner party, and sparking conversations.

Similarly, discovering a new book might inspire reading reviews, buying a copy, and even forming a casual book club with friends to share the experience.

3. Be open to others’ perspective

In a world where social media and algorithms often reinforce our existing views, experts stress the importance of stepping outside our ideological bubbles.

Damona Hoffman, host of the Dates & Mates podcast, encourages seeking diverse perspectives through reading, podcasts, travel, and conversations.

She believes engaging with different viewpoints leads to richer experiences and more interesting conversations.

Hoffman also notes that creating an environment where others feel comfortable sharing makes you more engaging.

Meanwhile, clinical sexologist Lawrence Siegel adds that good listening fosters meaningful connections and helps you relate to others, making you more interesting.

4. Pursue your passions

Experts agree that the most interesting people passionately explore unique interests, whether skin care, climate change, or voguing.

Travel journalist La Carmina says these individuals stand out because they dedicate their time to learning and sharing their passions, regardless of how others perceive their interests.

Suppose you need clarification on what excites you. In that case, illustrator Tevy Khou suggests reflecting on what brings you joy, even if it’s not a popular trend. Embracing self-love and focusing on your interests can help you discover what inspires you.

Siegel adds that surprising others with unexpected hobbies or traits can make you more memorable and interesting.

Moreover, Pirasteh emphasizes that authenticity is critical—being genuine when sharing your passions makes you stand out and keeps others engaged.

“Each of our lived experiences are unique and beautiful, and that alone makes us interesting people,” she said.

5. Date yourself

Hoffman often turns to Julia Cameron’s book The Artist’s Way to help herself and her clients discover new interests and personal growth.

One important idea from the book is the “artist date,” a weekly solo outing designed to explore something that sparks curiosity.

Cameron suggests activities like visiting a bird store, a bookstore, or a museum, noting that these don’t have to be artistic.

Hoffman advises treating these outings as scheduled appointments that should not be canceled for other distractions.

“Many people haven’t developed their interests because of a fear of being alone. It’s easier to go along with your friend or partner’s plans than go out on your own,” she said, emphasizing that spending time alone is crucial in discovering what truly brings joy without the pressure of pleasing others.

6. Talk to someone every day

Journalist Melinda Blau encourages making daily connections with others, whether through a quick phone call, a chat in line at the coffee shop, or a conversation with a neighbor.

Blau, author of The Wisdom Whisperers: Golden Guides to a Long Life of Grit, Grace, and Laughter, told HuffPost that being interesting comes from showing interest in those around you.

She emphasized the importance of listening, asking questions, and learning from others. Blau also highlighted studies showing that social interactions are as crucial to well-being as diet and exercise.

“Others are drawn to you, sensing your openness and curiosity. You’ll also feel better about yourself, and your relationships will flourish,” said Blau.

7. Listen to “quality” podcast

La Carmina enjoys listening to podcasts while doing everyday tasks like driving, exercising, or following her skincare routine.

In an interview with HuffPost, she explained that listening to podcasts across different genres often gives her surprising insights and new knowledge.

For example, she loves the Australian true crime podcast Casefile, which recently inspired her to help a friend develop thriller ideas.

She also tunes into podcasts like Sam Harris’ Making Sense, which keeps her engaged with current events and culture.

8. Avoid boring questions

Workplace culture expert Adam Smiley Poswolsky warns that questions like “Where are you from?” or “What do you do?” can lead to boring conversations.

The same goes for checking in with loved ones, where questions like “How have you been?” often feel routine.

Poswolsky, author of Friendship in the Age of Loneliness, suggests asking more engaging, open-ended questions—like “What song can you not get out of your head right now?”—to spark deeper connections.

Siegel adds that thoughtful questions help draw out unique perspectives, making conversations more meaningful.

Here’s a video from The School of Life that talks more about how to become an interesting person: