“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” — Lao Tzu
I would love to start this article saying life is an amazing adventure full of opportunities and happy moments. This is what people want to know about their lives. This is the life everyone would like to accept. But the truth is, life is unpredictable. Nothing is permanent, everything changes.
As a matter of fact, life evolves as many obstacles and severities as lucky chances and joy. Sometimes, for a long period, it offers you only painful experiences, so eventually, you turn into a real warrior and your life—into a scramble. You try to get what you think you are supposed to have and hope your attempts will be rewarded.
But have someone promised you there will be a prize in the end? Unfortunately, no. Thus, your efforts could be futile, and hopes—delusive. Do you want to get away from such developments? Then you have to learn the art of acceptance.
Make yourself the best gift possible
Often, our close people aren’t the easy-going ones, we have different points of view with them and argue a lot; however, we try to take easy on them because we love them. But when it is about us, there is no indulgence. No matter, what imperfection you have—quick temper, sensibility, or unpopular political opinion—you hate yourself for it.
Why? Don’t you deserve understanding?
Sure, you do. As much as any other person on Earth. But somehow you care about others, but not yourself. And here is where all the misfortunes appear.
We choose people we want to spend our lives with, but we always can leave. But we can’t escape from ourselves. This way, it is essential to become a true friend to yourself, deal with your imperfection; accept who you are.
The fight in the outer world begins in our souls. We fight our nature. We aim to be someone different; we play a role. At first, it could work. But soon you’ll find yourself surrounded by people who know and accept not you, but a person you created voluntarily.
And the real you will be compelled to live in the cage you created so diligently. The inner conflict will become stronger every day. Scary? Horrifying.
But somehow many of us suggest this kind of horror more appropriate for them than sincere life. Why? Because honesty is even more horrifying. Knowing the most distant corners of your conscious and all the thoughts that appear in your head (that are not all that pure) makes the way to self-acceptance a real torture. But at the same time, if you think about it, it makes it easier—as there are no surprises.
The way to self-acceptance can take years, but it doesn’t matter. It is your winning ticket, the first step you’re taking toward the happy life, and a good start is half the race.
Move from feeling happy to actually being happy
Self-acceptance will let you feel the inner peace. Meanwhile, life will keep its race, and situations you don’t want to meet will keep happening. Having accepted yourself and not accepted the life as it is, you probably will feel as equilibrist walking over the precipice—each wind blow could break your balance easily.
To hold it you have to realize the weather doesn’t depend on you. You can’t control it or impact it. Sure, you can show your strength and fight, again. But, making such choice, remember—every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Will you withstand? Dubiously. So, the best thing you can do is to accept these twists of fate and try to get the most of them.
“Know that everything is in perfect order whether you understand it or not.” — Valery Satterwhite
Remember, how much easier the things become when you stop to suspect your partner and start trusting them. Life is your partner, too. Do not be afraid of being deceived. Sometimes, it is the only right decision—to let go and follow.
There is time to persist, and there is time to accept
Obviously, acceptance lets you live fully not worrying about things you can’t change. However, there are two sides of the same coin.Occasionally, inspired by the idea of acceptance we quit working on things we can change. To not fall into this trap you have to be completely honest with yourself. Do not trick your mind. Acceptance doesn’t mean you can avoid acting at all. The passivity is as harmful as the excess of strenuous efforts.
Beyond any doubt, there are things that should be changed, and you are the one who can change them. It is how the life works. But even in this instance, acceptance is a tool that helps you to work on things with a light heart and steady hand which raises your chances to succeed and be happy significantly.
Having accepted your circumstances, you’ll always be in the empowered place to make changes. Just follow your nature and be ready to reap the harvest.
About The Author:
Kate Maurice is a passionate tutor who aims to make this world a better place by helping students to cope with challenges they meet. She writes for different educational platforms. You can find her articles HERE. Sharing her thoughts, she intends to help people believe in themselves.