FIVE ways to deal and stopping your insecurities from destroying your life

There will always be someone who is better than you. Someone who seems to be more beautiful, more intelligent, more successful. And sometimes, when you are all alone, lying on your bed at 2 in the morning, it’s hard not to think about all of the people who seem to be ahead of you.

Insecurity is defined as a feeling of the absence of confidence. It is a feeling characterized by lack of assurance and studded with fear, anxiety, and overthinking. But more than a feeling, insecurity is thought to be one of the leading causes of why people struggle to be happy.

In addition, insecurity has the power to kill relationships. And no, we are not only talking about romantic relationships but as well as the relationship that should be your number one priority, relationship with yourself.

People around you may not admit it, but believe it or not, everyone who has walked here on Earth experienced self-doubt and was unsure of themselves. There is nothing wrong about feeling insecure and inferior to others for it is normal to feel that way. What makes it wrong is if you will let this negativity affect your life to the point of robbing your happiness.

Here’ some powerful tips to help you manage and process your negative perception of yourself the next time insecurity knocks at your door.

[1] Make peace with your insecurities!

Humans are not perfect beings. Each of us has their own strength and weakness. Your officemate’s strengths can be a field you are not an expert of, and certainly, there are things that you can do which other people cannot.

Not everyone wakes up feeling beautiful and confident every single day. Our body is flawed, underneath the beautiful dresses and smart suits lies a body with a scar, a stretch mark, or blemish. People wake up with bed hairs, people strip their clothes and they see their love handles, people look in the mirror and see everything that they are not proud of, and that is okay.

Recognize, accept, and make peace with your insecurities. After all, the things about you that make you feel inferior is a part of yourself.  And no one should love you more than you can.

[2] Motivate yourself with your insecurities!

You don’t overcome your insecurities by simply recognizing them. Turn your negativity into positivity by taking actions. If you don’t feel beautiful in your own skin, take a look in the mirror and see what is it about you that you do not like.

Is it your hair? Is it your acne break-out? Is it your body shape? Then go to the salon and get a new haircut, ask your friends about skincare products, start eating healthy and hit the gym.

Is it about a subject you are not good at? Then borrow notes from your classmate, ask your friends for a group study, review and prepare for your quiz or exam to pass your subject.

There is nothing embarrassing in admitting to yourself that you need self-improvement. Rather than being pulled down by your insecurities, why don’t you use it as a motivation to be a better version of yourself?

[3] Be kind to yourself!

It is confusing how we can be generous with kind words to other people but ourselves. In a beauty campaign launched by the Dove soap last 2015, 9,397 women out of 11,000 women deemed themselves as average looking rather than beautiful. What does that say about our self-perception?

The next time you stare at yourself in front of a mirror, look hard and think hard. Remind yourself that you are a beautiful and wonderful individual. Shower yourself with a compliment. Give yourself a pat on your back after a long day of work.  And the next time you think about all the beautiful things, do not forget to count yourself.

[4] Stop comparing yourself with others!

True to Steve Furtick’s words, the reason why we struggle with insecurity is that we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel. There is no rose without a thorn, and one of the negative effects of social media is that people post everything that is happening in their lives online.

Splurged on new clothes, posted it online! Got promoted, updated it online! Took a selfie, uploaded it online! And it sure is hard not to compare what’s happening in your life to others if you constantly expose yourself to every detail they share in social media.

But instead of feeling down by the ‘achievements’ of others, know that their success is not synonymous with your failure. Learn to be genuinely happy for the happiness of others and you will be surprised by how peaceful your mind will become.

[5] Count the things you are grateful for!

Instead of focusing your attention and energy by having a round of self-pity, why don’t you count all of the beautiful things that happened in your life? Another day has been added to your life, you were able to cook a meal for yourself, you arrive at your work safe and sound.

Your boss applauded your work, you made someone happy, you have a home to return to. Counting these ‘simple’ blessings can boost your confidence and your mood!

The next time insecurity along with anxiety and overthinking knock at your door, take control over your thoughts. Keep these tips in your mind and do not let your insecurities eat you alive. Remember that thoughts have power and you attract what you think. There is no harm in always thinking positively!

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