Over the years, I’ve seen countless people-pleasers in my therapy office. But more often than not, people-pleasing wasn’t really their problem; their desire to make others happy was merely a symptom of a deeper issue. For many, the eagerness to please stems from self-worth issues. They hope that saying yes to everything asked of them will help them …
Reflections
We all know the golden rule: treat others the way you want to be treated. While this is an old adage we learn from an early age, there are a number of real-life benefits associated with the way we treat others. Science shows that as children, we’re biologically wired to be kind and we can …
As a 169-pound woman it’s not easy being the sibling of a 109-pounder who also happens to be my twin! She is my fraternal sibling, like it or not. Oh, I LOVE HER…. it’s that 4-letter word I didn’t much care for. Pick a DIET, ANY diet and I can tell you if it worked …
When I was 17 years old, I prepared for my A Levels in a two-year course in what is called a ‘junior college’ in my country. I also sang in the school choir and we had weekly afternoon sessions in one of the Lecture Theaters (LT). The theater was designed in the ‘paper fan’ shape …
Let me tell you a story. This is Susannah Lung. She taught me to read and write in a single year when I was 7 years old. I’ve been looking for Susannah, hoping to thank her in person, for almost twenty years. And then she surprised me at my reading last night. I came to …
On a trip back to my old hometown, I drove out to the senior’s residence to spend some time with my Mom. I hadn’t seen Mom in almost a year. My sisters, who have been there with her on her gradual descent into the murky fog of Alzheimer’s, warned that the visit would go hard …
Dear You, Yes, You. That woman underneath the myriad disguises you wear for all the people in your life; those you care for, those who rely on you, those that think they know you. That woman who might live life differently, if only… I’ve noticed you pause in the space between breaths. I’ve caught that wistful …
The cycle has to stop. You are worthy of all the love your heart can hold. The moment that someone makes you feel otherwise, is the moment you need to say goodbye. It will be very hard, and you’ll doubt yourself many times. You’ll even feel some remorse and regret. You’ll spend a lot of …
Sometimes I feel like I’m not quite cool enough. Sometimes I feel like I’m just not popular enough. Sometimes I feel like I don’t fit in the same way other people do. Sometimes I feel like there is a group who maybe doesn’t really want me there. Sometimes I wonder why I wasn’t invited. Sometimes …
Life can be a very funny thing, and often times the best approach is simply to laugh. I strongly believe that if we can learn to laugh at our follies, and find a way to chuckle in spite of the hardships we face, we would be able to finally begin experiencing the true joy that is …
A past relationship that made you stronger and smarter is not a wasted one. In life, we learn from our mistakes and experiences. We continue to move forward in pursuit of happiness and becoming the best version of ourselves. So we asked our community (Positive Outlooks) what they learned from their previous relationships and below …
Whenever she saw me drawing, my mother would tell me to stop. ‘You’ll be nothing but a poor artist,’ she’d say. Her life was very hard. She worked in a sweatshop, so she wanted me to get a ‘real job’ when I grew up. But art was the only thing I was good at. I …